House Rules

short-stories

Hello guest,

Thank you for choosing our home. We know that there are lots of great options out there, so we appreciate your decision to stay with us. Here are a few House Rules to help you get situated, and to make sure that your stay here is as enjoyable as possible.

  1. Check in is after 4 PM and check out is before 12 PM.
  2. You are welcome to park on the street, but you will need to move your vehicle into the driveway overnight. Please leave your keys on the table by the front door so that we can move your car back into the street before we leave in the morning.
  3. When arriving for the first time, please announce your presence by hanging out in a corner of the ceiling instead of dangling by a thread in someone’s face or crawling out from under a piece of furniture.
  4. The WiFi password is on the side of the router.
  5. You are welcome to help yourself to food in the kitchen. Especially the tiny ants. They’re assholes.
  6. Smoking inside the house is strictly prohibited.
  7. We are routinely complimented on the comfort level of the upstairs bathroom. Please, however, refrain from using our towels or medicine cabinet as place to nest. If you decide to take up residence in the shower, please make sure to do so on the side of the tub facing the shower-head, so that we can see you even when rinsing our hair.
  8. No pets.
  9. Encounters with the cats may be unavoidable. We do not offer refunds in the event that you or a member of your family gets eaten.
  10. While we are an equal opportunity renter, we ask that, if you are a member of a venomous species, that you refrain from using said venom during your stay.

Other than that, there are no rules! We sincerely hope that your visit to Cleveland is enjoyable. Let us know if you need restaurant or entertainment suggestions - we’re happy to help - and look us up on Arachnid BnB again!